Friday, September 20, 2013

An SOS note for dreary times

I need you to be there for me, when I'm nasty and unpleasant in my ways and mood. Don't preach and don't try to educate me, this is when I need you the most – when I'm not "fit" to be loved.
Yes, I know I'm a fool and I better straighten up my act or else… Yes, I know I've been pretty much inviting the universe to slap me in the face… but now that it's happened, can I please snuggle into your embracing arms and drown my tears in your silent attention?
Just listen to my voice droning on, nod and listen to my eyes, my heart. Sit nearby, don't shy away, your embarrassment embarrasses me. Let me open my heart, it's been slammed shut for too long, dying.
There is no need to be nervous, I'm not waiting for you to bring the perfect solution, just to listen. Be my wailing wall, a wall that never falls or fails, and nothing more. There is nothing more I would like in this world right now.
Please don't roll your eyes, I'm trying to watch them, scrying for my real self that I lost so long ago. Be still, and I know I will be found, I know I have a sturdy foundation to come back to – following the bread crumb trail I left crisscrossing our relationship. Be still and hold me tight, there is no need to nudge me home, in times as these I draw my strength from you.

Believe in me, so I can believe in myself.

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